Ever felt like you needed to conform to the norms of a group? Like you needed to please people? Yeah same, and all I can say is FUCK THAT! There is nothing more draining than trying to please everyone in your life. Why do we feel the need to do this? Why can’t we just be who we are and not give a shit? Because we are so afraid of losing people. But guess what, if you lose people for being who you really are then they weren’t real friends in the first place!
Losing people you thought were friends is not an easy thing. It makes our brains move a mile a minute thinking about why they didn’t like the real you. But sometimes losing those people is blessing in disguise. It makes room in your life for new friends who will love you for YOU. And that is the best damn thing in the world. Be unapologetically you and see what happens! It might just change your life.
Do you ever overreact to a situation, conversation, or even just vibes? You automatically assume everyone’s out to get you? Make shit up or misinterpret things only to make yourself look like an ass? We more often than not think that everyone is out to get us. We overthink things, we imagine the worse, and we sometimes even change the interpretation of the script because we subconsciously want it to be negative.
Surprise surprise, we ruin relationships this way. If we stop and pause before we react to what we hear, read or see and do something that will distract our reaction, it will disrupt our immediate reaction. Count to 10, sing a favorite song, repeat a favorite word, etc., are just a few things that could be of help. After having a chance to ease our mind we can change our interpretation to have a positive reaction that can work in our favor.
Waiting? Fuck that! Don’t wait for anything. I hate to break it to you, but if you want a different life or if you want something to happen, you and only you can do it! Look, there’s some bad news. There is no fairy god mother who will swoop in and wave her magic wand to make things happen for you. There is no magic pill, no secret sauce, no quick fix, no overnight success, no right time, and definitely no safe zone.
However, there is some good news amongst the bad. The good news is it’s a level playing field for anyone who is willing to grind and grit. If you want it bad enough your reason WHY will overcome your excuses that always seem to come up. Start by having your conscious mind and your subconscious mind be in sync with one other. You need to have them agree to a pact. This way they move in the same direction of your WHY. Tell them how their cooperation can make shit happen. Give yourself a schedule of simple to-do’s that will move you in the direction of your dreams. It starts with you, your conscious and unconscious mind. The time will pass either moving forward or doing nothing. So start now and slay!
Isn’t it about time you work on your own happy ending? Why should you go through life trying to please everyone else? It’s time to stop living someone else’s wish and start living your own. I know, it’s easier said than done. But it’s not impossible. Start with writing down some thoughts to help you explore your situation. After that, create a plan from there. Then just start!
Answer these questions:
What do you enjoy spending time on?
Who lifts you up?
What’s in the way of your happiness?
What can you do to work around those obstacles?
What changes do you need to make in order to make shit happen?
Whose gotta go?
Janis Joplin once said, “My business is to have fun because in the end, it’s all going to end.” She was right. That’s all going to end, so wake the fuck up and start living your best life. Why the hell not!
Basic B: Are u serious?
Weirdo: Excuse me, what?
Basic B: That outfit u had on today? Takes a brave soul to wear that lmfao
Weirdo: Wtf do you mean by that?
Basic B: All I’m saying is, you can’t go wrong with a pair of Lulu Lemon leggings, crop top and Vans or whatever. It’s simple, cute, and everyone is wearing it. Maybe you would fit in more if you would dress like the rest of us… You’re drawing SO much attention to yourself ya know, and not the good kind
Weirdo: You really think I’m trying to draw attention to myself?
Basic B: Why else would you wear something like that? #yikes
Weirdo: Idk maybe because I like it? because I feel comfortable in it?
Basic B: In that?! Hahahah interesting..
Weirdo: Please just stop yourself.
Basic B: I’m trying to help you!!
Weirdo: No you’re being an ass
Basic B: Oh so I’m being an ass for trying to help you not get made fun of??
Weirdo: Yup. You’re an ass. You’re trying to tell me to not be myself and frankly I love myself.
Weirdo: Call me what you want, make fun of me, idgaf.
Basic B: Ok weirdo. Last time I try to help you.
Basic B: Have fun being the laughingstock of the school!!!!
Weirdo: I might be weirdo, the laughingstock, the odd one out, but I freaking love who I am. I am a confident weirdo. Screw you & everyone else who can’t handle that.
Perfection. It’s something people are continuously striving for whether that be in looks, foods, styles, etc. People will go to great lengths to embody the societal idea of “perfect” such as Botox, Photoshop, and even plastic surgery. But is perfection really something we should be striving for? There is a significant beauty in differences, in imperfection.
In the Japanese art of Kintsugi, when something breaks they fill it with gold to mend it. The broken, imperfect piece is now highlighted with beautiful marks. They do not throw something away, or hide it when it is broken. They fix it and emphasize the imperfections. The idea of celebrating imperfections in Kintsugi is an idea society should emphasize rather than the idea of perfection.
If everyone in the world was “perfect” it would be quite boring. Differences are special. They make people unique. We should not be trying to cover up our differences or imperfections but showcasing the beauty of them. They make us who we are and that is beautiful. Love your imperfections for what they are, and who they make you. That is much more special and meaningful than being “perfect.”
Ever been in such a hurry to get somewhere important and it’s as if the universe knows? It’s like it purposely sets a roadblock directly in your driving route to slow you down even more and make you late. So you gotta swerve into another lane to find a clear route without anything to slow you down to get you to your destination. Yeah that’s what it should be like with toxic people in your life. The kind of people who are your “friends” but don’t believe in you and your dreams. You should swerve right out of that damn lane.
People who don’t believe in you are significantly brining you down. They’re a road block in the route of your dreams. Why would you want someone who doesn’t approve of you in your life anyway? That kind of negative energy can be detrimental. It can make you insecure, question your dreams, and just sad. All I can say is screw that. Who needs negative Nelly’s in their life?? NOT US. We need people who believe in us and what we want to do whole heartedly. They make the strenuous road to our dreams just a little bit easier!